Any place in this building that does not have a continuous flow of fresh air has the potential to be a death trap. Theres a person who works here that has the power to poison at will…we call this person “The drive by shitter.” You know, it’s one thing to let a fart bubble go and try to run around making it spread in all directions, but the drive by shitter…..he don’t, and we figure it MUST be a man, no woman craps her pants like that…no woman….anyway the drive by shitter dumps this cloud from out of his rectum and engulfs entire work areas! Thick, wet and toxic, these clouds are the aurora borealis of methane…they are legend….I’ve been subjected to the intestinal assault, when it happens to other people, it’s funny, but when it’s you….gross, I’ve lost clumps of hair after some attacks. We’ve tried to figure out who it is, but his identity remains a mystery. It happened today, while I was running around trying to look like I was doing something, I turned a corner and was hit. Like a slap in the face with a soiled pair of skivies, I stumbled backwards fanning the air in front of me, ofcourse someone was coming from the other direction and when they passed through the cloud looked at me with disgust, “Not I. Theres nothing rotting inside MY colon.” We both went our seperate directions each person soiled by the incident. The drive by shitter…strikes again
All that being said, I have to last 3 more days until vacation. PULEASE let it go quickly. Well Easter was a bust, Jesus didn’t come back…AGAIN….he never shows…..
