Friday, May 9, 2008

Two children and their mother lived for about two months with the decaying body of a 90-year-old woman on the toilet of their home’s only bathroom, on the advice of a religious “superior” who claimed the corpse would come back to life, authorities said Friday.

The children — a 15-year-old girl and a 12-year-old boy — cried hysterically Wednesday after a deputy who came to their Necedah home looking for Magdeline Alvina Middlesworth ordered them out because of the stench from her body.

Whats worse, being so old that you just die while pooping, or being so stupid that you think a rotting corpse is going to come back to life…I choose the stupid, you can’t change dead..obviously.

I had to go into work today, it seems our pathological liar didn’t make it in for the past two days, which put us a bit behind schedule…so, we were coming up with different scenarios as to why she could not make it in (remember this is the woman who wove the tale of being late one morning because her uncle died in angola from bird flu)my thoughts were either

A) abducted by aliens

B)taken hostage by Afgan warlords, becoming a sex slave willingly “Come on boys, three holes, no waiting!”  She breaks free though due to McGuyver use of duct tape, chewing gum and a paper clip, thank heavens shes back on Monday…burp.

It seems that skidmark Barack Obama is kicking Hillary Clintons ass, too bad, I can’t stand Bareback, not that I’m a big fan of Hillary but he just irritates me. Hillary, at least, makes no bones about the fact shes a  slimey politician, pantsuit , sensible shoes and all.  Bareback is very reminiscent of our very own governor of Snatchacustetts, Duval Patrick…Patirck made alot of rah, rah, speeches that really didn’t have much content, but we all cheered, he ran on this vomit spewing message “together we can” it made everyone moist…anyway we voted him in ( I voted for Kerry Healy)….after we voted him in we all waited for these important earth shattering and fiscally explosive changes…he didn’t disappoint, he bought a new Cadillac and some million dollar draperies for his new office…great, as my father would say “You idiots in Mass keep voting Kennedy in, you get what you deserve” amen pop.  So, I can either vote for the shit smeared nickel, Barack, or the slightly confused (early onset of dementia) MaCain….can I vote for Hugo Chavez, I think I will.

Gross, soon she’ll need a hoverround…appropriate for cattle.

I like Collective Soul